So, what does your Aikido or if you participate in another martial art mean to you?
I ask this question as I've recently attended a weekend course and had a chance to attempt another grading. It was very tempting, for quite a few reasons, and I have to say all of them wrong reasons for grading. I will be very honest when I heard that people I knew were grading, I really wanted to join them on the mat at least to try.
But I decided not to. Its not that I don't ever want to grade to brown and eventually (I hope) to black- it just feels wrong at this moment in time. It feels too soon, it feels wrong somehow to even think about grading when my last grading was before Christmas.
The point is, I didn't grade because I've come to realise whats important to me about my Aikido- and its not to grade. I never started Aikdo for the much desired black belt- I started for self-defence reasons and to give myself a little self-confidence boost. I only started grading because it seemed a good way to remain focused on my training.
However, its now become clear to me that I don't do Aikido so I can grade, I do Aikido because I find it fulfils me in a way in which I can't explain. In fact, I'm finding that I sometimes get more enjoyment of working with the new beginners and lower grades- its a great feeling if you're training with someone who is relatively new to Aikido when they manage to use a technique that they have been struggling with and put you to the floor.
Thats when it hits me- I've often wondered what my Aikido is and I think I finally found it. My Aikdo isn't necessarily about always wanting to reach the next belt- I now much prefer to help others along the path...just as three years ago my Sengpai helped me.
Sunday, 16 August 2009
Sunday, 7 June 2009
Chapter 47: Why do people think female martial artists are violent and can't call themselves a lady?
Well, where to start? First of all,an awful lot of stuff has happened since my last post.
Firstly I got engaged at Easter and secondly the Doctor has finally sorted my IBS with the right medication which means for the first time in a good six months I am able to train without painful bowel spasms. Joy!
I also think that my attitude to training has changed somewhat. I currently train at two different clubs, one slightly more formal than the other and I'm finding that my self-discipline has (I like to think anyway) improved some what. I stay more focused on the point in hand and have developed a very scary drive to training.
Since getting my blue belt in January, its like I've grown a new skin, I've become more fluid and graceful in movement but at the same time have developed a hard attitude against the little voice in my head, you know the one says 'you can't do that' and ignore it completely - in fact I rarely hear it anymore.
Now I'm getting to the point of my post. It's really interesting how people view you as a martial artist. I've been told that 'I don't look like a martial artist'. I'm sorry, but what is a martial artist supposed to look like? A hard faced killer?
I was at a demo recently for sports and it was strange how people do a runner when they see people in Gis, especially the girls my age. It was also interesting how many people didn't know what Aikdio was or how the principles may be applied against an attacker.
What really annoys me though is how some women think that being a martial artist makes you less feminine, less of a lady. In fact, I have been labelled a 'heretic' to womanhood in the past just because I thought short hair and fingernails were more practical for doing sport. I don't know whats the issue here, its like people think I don't care about my appearance or something, but you will find that in many changing rooms all female aikidocca are discussing 'beauty' tips. Well, more about moisturing and curing Gi burn really. So you see we do care about our appearance. In fact, for nights out alot of the men I train with are amazed that we make such an effort - well, they see us at our worst, all sweaty and horrible so its our chance to show we can scrub up well I suppose. Sorry, I should scrap that sentence, I should say 'horses sweat, gentlemen perspire, ladies merely glow'. What a load of rubbish!
In fact, I was talking to someone about this a few months back at a course. Yeah, okay I now have short hair and I did enjoy having long fingernails but it was so time consuming to do your hair and look after your nails (maybe I was just lazy). We also got talking about why young women don't do martial arts - and the only think we could think of was that they maybe think they will develop into muscular amazons or something and get huge, but the reality is we don't have the testosterone for it! So yeah, out has gone the long hair and nice fingernails, but I've gained so much for a supposed 'loss of femininity', for one thing- without Aikido, I wouldn't have met my fiancé. I met him on an Aiki night out!
Firstly I got engaged at Easter and secondly the Doctor has finally sorted my IBS with the right medication which means for the first time in a good six months I am able to train without painful bowel spasms. Joy!
I also think that my attitude to training has changed somewhat. I currently train at two different clubs, one slightly more formal than the other and I'm finding that my self-discipline has (I like to think anyway) improved some what. I stay more focused on the point in hand and have developed a very scary drive to training.
Since getting my blue belt in January, its like I've grown a new skin, I've become more fluid and graceful in movement but at the same time have developed a hard attitude against the little voice in my head, you know the one says 'you can't do that' and ignore it completely - in fact I rarely hear it anymore.
Now I'm getting to the point of my post. It's really interesting how people view you as a martial artist. I've been told that 'I don't look like a martial artist'. I'm sorry, but what is a martial artist supposed to look like? A hard faced killer?
I was at a demo recently for sports and it was strange how people do a runner when they see people in Gis, especially the girls my age. It was also interesting how many people didn't know what Aikdio was or how the principles may be applied against an attacker.
What really annoys me though is how some women think that being a martial artist makes you less feminine, less of a lady. In fact, I have been labelled a 'heretic' to womanhood in the past just because I thought short hair and fingernails were more practical for doing sport. I don't know whats the issue here, its like people think I don't care about my appearance or something, but you will find that in many changing rooms all female aikidocca are discussing 'beauty' tips. Well, more about moisturing and curing Gi burn really. So you see we do care about our appearance. In fact, for nights out alot of the men I train with are amazed that we make such an effort - well, they see us at our worst, all sweaty and horrible so its our chance to show we can scrub up well I suppose. Sorry, I should scrap that sentence, I should say 'horses sweat, gentlemen perspire, ladies merely glow'. What a load of rubbish!
In fact, I was talking to someone about this a few months back at a course. Yeah, okay I now have short hair and I did enjoy having long fingernails but it was so time consuming to do your hair and look after your nails (maybe I was just lazy). We also got talking about why young women don't do martial arts - and the only think we could think of was that they maybe think they will develop into muscular amazons or something and get huge, but the reality is we don't have the testosterone for it! So yeah, out has gone the long hair and nice fingernails, but I've gained so much for a supposed 'loss of femininity', for one thing- without Aikido, I wouldn't have met my fiancé. I met him on an Aiki night out!
Wednesday, 25 March 2009
Chapter 46: Why is it no matter how hard you train, something always gets the better of you?
Well, thats it- I've done something I've never done... I had to ask to be excused during a training session. There was a good reason (honest).
The fact is, my Irritable Bowel (IBS) is getting the better of me during training. Its flared up again, which makes some techniques like Gedan-ate difficult to work with-basically because it hurts when someone catches me with it over the their leg. I had to sit out towards the end of the session even though I really really didn't want to because I knew the technique we were working on would only make me feel worse.
I was a little ashamed to tell you the truth, because when you get to blue belt training is about mind over matter right? You're not meant to whimp out! Sensi understood I needed the 10 minutes but I still feel a little put out that its preventing me from participating fully in training at the moment. Still, all part of the learning curve right?
Anyway, hopefully things will settle down soon. Apart from the old IBS rearing its ugly head again, I find I'm enjoying my training more than ever. Japanese terminology no longer seems alien and now I've started learning the higher grade katas I've come to appreciate the beauty of the circular movement involved in Aikido. Why did I not see this before?
The fact is, my Irritable Bowel (IBS) is getting the better of me during training. Its flared up again, which makes some techniques like Gedan-ate difficult to work with-basically because it hurts when someone catches me with it over the their leg. I had to sit out towards the end of the session even though I really really didn't want to because I knew the technique we were working on would only make me feel worse.
I was a little ashamed to tell you the truth, because when you get to blue belt training is about mind over matter right? You're not meant to whimp out! Sensi understood I needed the 10 minutes but I still feel a little put out that its preventing me from participating fully in training at the moment. Still, all part of the learning curve right?
Anyway, hopefully things will settle down soon. Apart from the old IBS rearing its ugly head again, I find I'm enjoying my training more than ever. Japanese terminology no longer seems alien and now I've started learning the higher grade katas I've come to appreciate the beauty of the circular movement involved in Aikido. Why did I not see this before?
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